You work out of a Hotel?
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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