how can u be prego again
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
