Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
