ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Randomize
