I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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