in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
of course. lets lasso hookers.
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
Randomize
