Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
