Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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