I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
Randomize
