I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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