you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
This is the prime rib incident all over again
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Randomize
