Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
PANTIES FOUND
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
