what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
