Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
