I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
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