what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Randomize
