There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
Randomize
