yo i stole a wine glass from the ritz but i spilled wine on my hundo dolla shirt
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
