he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
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