I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
17 year olds will be the death of me.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
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