brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
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