I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
She's JV to your varsity
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
Randomize