is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Randomize
