well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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