But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
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