Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
I always "accidentally" drop a condom and make sure she sees it's a magnum. By the time I'm inside her and she realizes how small I am, it's all over in a flash and I'm done. Plus, they never call back so I never have to see the girl ever again. #gratefulforprematuretinypenis
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
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