i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
