Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
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