Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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