i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
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