You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
either way he was missing a nipple.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Randomize
