just come out here and I will go home with you...
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Randomize
