As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Randomize
