For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize
