I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
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