Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
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