were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Is this like a preordered booty call?
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
Randomize
