I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize