Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
