No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
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