Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Randomize
