the new term for farting is butt boxing.
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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