she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
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