he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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