Your face is a jimmy john
I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Randomize
