like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
I could have mohawked her pubes.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
Randomize
