didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
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