What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I showed him my bush... on skype.
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
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