I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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