it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
